“To
be or not to be--that is the question” asks Hamlet... and that is
indeed the question. But what does it really mean? What does it
mean, “to be”?
I
first became aware of the magnitude of this question while sitting in
a Spanish class at El Camino College. We were going over our
homework, an exercise on the two spanish verbs “to be”, ser verse
estar. In spanish, one of the first things you learn is which verb
“to be” to use. Ser is used in description, origin and time, as
in “Yo soy Felicia” (I am Felicia); “Yo soy
de Chicago” (I am from Chicago); “Es
el martes, 23 de abril de 2013” (It is
Tuesday, April 23, 2013). Estar is used in locations and conditions,
as in “Yo estoy
sentado en la mesa de la cocina” (I am sitting at the kitchen
table); and “Yo estoy cansada esta manana” (I am tired this
morning). :)
As
I sat in class, listening to the instructor reviewing the rules for
Ser vs. Estar, I had an epiphany. That “being” is far more
complex than I had prievously imagined. That the state of being was
important enough for an entire culture to desginate different words
for various states of being, and that which word to use is determined
by whether or not you, as an individual have the power to change your
state of being. I am from Chicago, I can't change that therefore, yo
soy
de Chicago. I am sitting at the kitchen table, I can change that at
anytime by moving, therefore yo estoy sentada en la mesa de la
cocina. I am Felicia, I cannot change the essence of who I am (i.e.,
my history, my lineage, what I value, my likes, my dislikes, my
personality, etc). All these things combine to make me uniquely “me”
therefore yo soy Felicia. We are a recipe that has taken untold
generations and combinations create. We do have choices of traits
that we emphasis, but the very fact that we choose them is an
indication of who we are... and of who's we are.
2
Corinthians 5:17 says “Therefore
if any man be
in Christ, he
is
a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are
become new.” Christ is the only one who can change our nature and
cause us to be something new. When we receive him in our hearts, we
become “new creatures in Christ”, but even the desire to receive
Christ has to connect with something that already exists within us.
“Deep calls unto deep...” [Ps. 42:7], we have “an ear to hear”
[Matt. 11:15], we then can receive Him in our hearts and then we can
become something new... born again, but the desire “to be” fully
was always there. We simply answer the call of that “still small
voice” and we become fully God's children and not merely his
creation. “For in him we live and move and have our being.' As
some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'” [Acts
17:28]
I
know this from my own personal experience. When I was a practicing
Roman Catholic, as much as I loved the church and my faith, I knew
there was “something” missing. I couldn't put my finger on it or
articulate fully, but I knew there had to be something more. While
visiting Love Fellowship Tabernacle and listening to Pastor Daryl
Coley, who at the time was a family friend, I heard the altar call
and it connected with something so deep within me, that I literally
stepped on my mother's friend (accidently of course) to get to that
altar. I HAD to get there. The depth that is God called to the deep
that was within me... my deep need to know (gnosis) that God loved
me, my deep need to feel whole and my deep need to no longer be sad,
because depression was something that I had dealt with all of my
life.
By
going to that altar, and receiving Christ in my heart, I had been
given the power to change my state of being, to change my “estar”,
my condition, and to become the “ser” I was always intended to be
from the beginning of time. “According as he hath chosen us in him
before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and
without blame before him in love” [Ephesians 1:4] and that was my
beginning in really knowing what it means “to be”. Now, in Him I
live and move and truly have my being.
